ASSISTED LIVING IN NEW JERSEY
My first awareness of assisted living started back before the term was
invented. In the 70’s my mother took care of a Mrs. Hague, an elegant senior
woman from Rumson. Mom had been a nurse in her early years and in her
sixties would act as a nurse and care taker for older women. Mrs. Hague
lived in a home next to the Rumson Country Club. I would stop in from time
to time to visit with them.
It was a beautiful home full of pictures of her family and life. Her
wedding pictures from the 1920’s were of her and her husband on camels in
Egypt. I would sit and listen to stories of her youth, I saw her as a living
time capsule explaining the cultural codes and life styles of her day. Mom
was very attached to Mrs. Hague and stayed with her until she passed away.
Mrs. Hague’s brother came and took care of the estate. Most of the furniture
was given a way and the house was sold at below market value according to my
mother. She explained that he was older and lived out of state and needed to
resolve the estate quickly.
Around this time the Navesink House was being built on Riverside Avenue
in Red Bank. I vaguely understood that seniors would turn over there estates
to this organization and then would be taken care of for life with almost
all needs both living and medical would be provided for their lifetimes.
My best friend Mark LaMura lived in the Twin Gables next to the Navesink
House. There is a driveway between the two buildings belonging to Navesink
house. I would pull in there to visit him as parking was even at that time
hard to come by. A couple of times a couple of the senior ladies would yell
at me out the windows that that was private parking. I would answer that I
would “only be a minute” and run inside for up to half and hour and leave.
The third time I did that I came out to find bumper stickers covering my
windshield. The giggles rang out from the windows above as I scrapped the
stickers off my windshield.
All I could do was smile as I had been outfoxed by senior foxes. It was a
good lesson. You can't outfox or outthink the seniors. They have years of
experience on us. I rarely ever parked there again unless it was very late
at night and only to run in for a “real minute.” That was how I met Emily
one night and became aware of how our parents become our children. (To be
continued.) |